Author: A Dittmeier

Sinatra, Peter, and Me

/ A Dittmeier / 1 Comment

The other day my husband and I parked by an expensive convertible sports car.  On it was a sticker that stated, “My Life My Way.”  Of course, it brought to mind Frank Sinatra and how he proclaimed about his life, “I did it my way.”  You may be surprised to know that I envy Frank.  No, I don’t want to live my life my way, because I know that would lead to disaster.  I want to live God’s way.  Sinatra, however, goes on to say something that I envy….”Regrets, I’ve had a few, but then again, too few too mention.”

I am unable to truthfully share such sentiments as Frank expressed.  There are many choices I wish I had made differently–words I should or shouldn’t have used, actions I should or shouldn’t have taken, in each case doing the exact opposite of what God would have had me to do.  They lie in the past unchangeable, indelible.

Recently I posted about how Peter’s faith in the midst of fear allowed him to walk on water.  Tonight, though, I want to bring up something very different about him.  Peter made regretful choices.  Having sworn his undying allegiance to Jesus, Peter nonetheless, driven by fear, denied knowing Jesus three times following Christ’s arrest.  Jesus had foretold he would do this, but Peter couldn’t fathom choosing so poorly in light of his devotion and love for the Messiah.  Matthew 26 tells us that just as he realized he had done exactly as Jesus had prophesied, he went out and wept bitterly.

Have you ever wept bitterly over your own actions?  Have you done so as a believer who, in spite of knowing Christ and his mercy, defied his will for your life?  I have.  I can relate to Peter.  But here’s the question?  What do we do with our regrets?

If we are like Sinatra, we can minimize them.  We can push them aside and focus on better things.  As Christians, however, we don’t have that liberty.  Rebellion against God brings anguish and consequences into our lives.  We feel the distance it creates between us and God.  We regret our regrets.  But what do we do with them?

As it turns out, Peter’s denial of Christ came in the days after the Passover and prior to Christ’s crucifixion.  We are in those very days right now.  On Friday of this Holy Week, we recognize the Christ who bore our sins on the Cross.  Every wrong choice, every word spoken in anger, every act of mercy withheld, he bore.  Every lie, immoral act, murder, or hateful deed we would someday carry out, were inflicted upon him in the form of torture unto death.  Jesus gave himself up for us on a cross precisely because we are unable to live regret-free lives.  He who had committed no sin died for those who could not keep from it.  This, Christian, is where we place our regrets.  We ask forgiveness, yes, and then we lay them down at the Cross where Jesus died that we might be free of them.

My Unwelcome Visitor

/ A Dittmeier / Leave a comment

Image 

 

It’s here again.  I don’t know why–did I somehow invite it, or is it simply stubbornly and independently raring its ugly head against me?  I hate when it visits. 

Fear.

If one were to ask me what I fear, oh, there’s a host of answers I could give.  I fear losing my family.  I fear something happening to one of my children or my granddaughter.  I fear car accidents.  I fear the enemy of my soul and the attacks he plots against me. 

When the lights fade and the noise of the world subsides for another night’s rest, that’s when I’m typically most gratified.  I LOVE silence.  I enjoy solitude. 

And then there are those times….those excruciating times when my unwelcome visitor comes. 

What is fear?  A quick dictionary check calls it a “distressing emotion aroused by a sense of impending danger, evil, pain…whether real or imagined.” 

To me as a believer, however, it is goes much deeper.  It is that which presents itself to challenge my trust in God’s faithfulness in my life.  Fear, especially of the unknown, is the enemy of faith.  And the antidote of fear is faith.  Easily said, but how does one apply truth to the problem of fear?

First, I understand that I am in great company.  Peter the apostle, who spent years in the presence of Christ, experienced fear.  He walked on water, yet began sinking when he allowed fear to envelop him.  As soon as he set his eyes upon Christ, his fear was dispelled, and he again stood solidly upon that which was liquid.  Fear also caused him to deny Christ three times.  David, the shepherd who became king, expressed fear repeatedly in the Psalms, yet implored himself to put his hope in God.  Because of his fear, Abraham repeatedly lied about Sarah being his wife, believing that her beauty would motivate rulers to have him killed so they could have her.  In all cases, however, God’s faithfulness conquered fear. 

At the Cross of Christ our fears should be extinguished.  Did he not conquer death?  Did he not overcome sin?  There’s a well-known verse in Jeremiah that says.  “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” (29:11, NIV)  This promise was given to the Israelites who were in exile….dispersed among enemy lands.  It was a horrible time for them.  And it’s a horrible time for us, folks.  If we watch the news, like Peter, we can easily begin to sink.  There are just SO MANY heart wrenchingly sad and evil and frightening things happening in this world.  But Jesus comforts us in John 16 when he tells us, “I have told you these things so that in me you may have peace.  In this world you will have trouble.  But take heart!  I have overcome the world.”  Can I get an AMEN?

So this is what I do when this unwanted visitor of mine shows up to disturb my peace.  Like Peter, I set my eyes back upon Christ.  I turn to the promises God has given me in his word.  I remind myself of the faithfulness which He has constantly exhibited in my life.  I pray until I trust.

And like Peter, I rise. 

 

The above image was hijacked from radicalrunning.blogspot.com via Bing images. 

Passions and the Pursuit of Them

/ A Dittmeier / Leave a comment

Image

 

Over the past few days I’ve become acutely aware of the battle that is being waged for my passion.  Because I am a single soul in a grandiose universe, I am seriously dumbfounded.  Why does my passion matter?  The other day, I talked about the importance of one. I’d like to bring it up in a different context again today–the importance of the passions of one.  To talk about that, I have to start with one profoundly simple statement.  Jesus Christ died that I might be saved.  That’s it.

Merriam-Webster defines the word passion in several ways:

1) a strong feeling or excitement for something or about doing something

2) a strong feeling (such as anger) that causes you to act in a dangerous way

3) a strong sexual or romantic feeling for someone.

Most of us have felt one or more of these, have we not?

Given those definitions, I can tell you that many things stir “passion” within me…my family, my baby granddaughter, cycling, fitness classes, yummy healthy foods, travel…..there’s an endless list.  Ironically or not, the definition for “Passion,” when capitalized, happens to be “the suffering and death of Jesus Christ between the Last Supper and the Cross.”  Countless millions of people have suffered and died,  yet the true definition of Passion singles out Jesus alone.  This matters to me, and it serves as a reminder to me.  Christ alone suffered and died for me!  Many, many entities will compete for my passions, but Jesus….he DIED for them.

Here’s the truth.  There is ONE throne that inhabits the ruler our hearts…..just one.  Sure, we can love many, many people and things. Jesus gave room for these, in their proper position, when he taught us this in Matthew 6:33:  “But seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.” (KJV)  In other words, if we put Jesus on the throne of our hearts–the very object of our passion, he will provide for us all else we need.  There isn’t a single other competitor for my heart that can promise me that.

Let me give you a phrase that can serve as a warning bell when someone or something seeks to captivate your passion….”_______” will change your life!  Or in another way….”_______” has changed my life!”  Put any word in that blank, good or bad, it is counterfeit!  If Jesus isn’t in that blank, no life has been or will be changed.  It is idolatry, plain and simple.  I don’t care if it makes you gorgeous, rich, healthy, skinny, well-educated, virile, happy, or pain-free.  If Jesus is not in that blank, your life has yet to be changed.

Getting back to the matter of the importance of the passions of one, I offer this:  That which drives you controls your life.  Why are your specific passions important?  It is because they will determine the choices you make and the very effect you will have in the lives of others.  He or that which inhabits the throne of your heart will determine the impact you make in this world.  Will it be temporary or eternal?  Will it lead to temporary satisfaction or eternal satisfaction?  If it ain’t Jesus, it’s temporary.  No exceptions.

 

(above image hijacked from livewithpassionnow.com)

Expect the Unexpected

/ A Dittmeier / Leave a comment

I’ve grown accustomed to hearing the above phrase used in reference to God and his actions in our lives, but this was different….I was reading the phrase yesterday on the marquee of a closed down stripper club.  It piqued my curiosity.  It also took me back in time.

Back when we lived in the the outer rim of civilization near Mesa, Arizona, our two oldest children spent a year attending a beautiful, mission-style Anglican church school.

trinity

Trinity Christian School remains the most beautiful campus I’ve ever seen. The highlight of each morning took place as I drove the kids to study amidst the cacti, tumbleweed, boulders, and sand. There was, however, one blemish: one mile from the school, there was an intersection that contained a single business–a triple x-rated video store. I hated this interruption to the beauty that surrounded us. We’d developed a habit of praying before they left the vehicle to go to class, so I began asking God if he would mind shutting down that business. For three or four months, it became part of our morning prayer ritual–asking the Creator of the universe to remove an adult video store from our morning desert drives.

Something happens when you pray with children. At the same time you’re thinking, “Yeah, I know, this is never going to happen,” children are asking in faith. They haven’t lived to take on the doubt and cynicism that often infect our adult hearts.

Imagine our delight the morning we made our drive to school and saw on the marquee of that adult video store, “LOST OUR LEASE!  EVERYTHING HALF PRICE!” The Creator of the Universe, the Redeemer of our souls, had heard our prayers and answered in a “Too easy!” fashion!

The building was bulldozed, and up came an Exxon/McDonalds there in the middle of the desert….with no other businesses around! Okay, I’m not going to pretend it was nearly as pretty as our little church school, but it KILLED the ugliness of the adult video store. Furthermore, it provided a place where we could get fuel and ice cream in one stop.

I hope yesterday’s “Expect the Unexpected” message at this newly closed-down stripper bar in San Antonio will yield way to something amazing God’s going to do. I pray that women will no longer be legally degraded, objectified, demeaned, and bought & sold in that building. My prayer is that whatever the “unexpected,” may entail in this situation, it will, at the very least, involve ice cream or, better yet, a church.

Just sing….

/ A Dittmeier / Leave a comment

We’ve all had nightmares like this, haven’t we? We find ourselves in front of a crowd, unprepared….incompetent….set up in such a way as to look like idiots.

It was our first post-adoption trip to Ukraine. We accompanied the founder and president of Hope Now, an organization that works to aid the infrastructure in Ukraine in the areas of hospitals, orphanages, prisons, and education. I’ve just spelled HOPE, did you catch that?

There I was in a church service inside a men’s prison, the first of its kind in the whole of the former Soviet Union. I WAS AN OBSERVER!!!! You can imagine my horror when Vic, the president, looked at me and said, “I want you to speak.”

“WHAT??!!!???”

“I want you to speak.”

“Well, I can’t you see, because I am a WOMAN, and these are men. At my church I’m not allowed to……”

“Speak.” He answered.

I got up and walked to the front. Everyone was silent as they waited, having watched us go through our debate in a language they didn’t understand. I fumbled through my Bible to a Psalm that had meant very much to me, and began to read. The interpreter repeated in Ukrainian everything I spoke. I had never done this in any church, let alone a prison church. I then explained how I felt this passage could apply to their lives. Relieved to be finished, I turned to go back to my seat.

“Sing.” Vic was giving me one word commands again.

“WHAT?” You’ve got to be kidding me.

“Sing.” I can’t sing.

“But I can’t sing.”

“That doesn’t matter, just sing.”

Regretting my return to Ukraine by this point, I turned back toward a room full of thieves, murderers, and all that landed themselves in this prison church. I chose a hymn I’d known as long as I could remember. Amazing Grace. Other than my voice, you could have heard a pin drop. No one moved. These men, with no bars between themselves and me, sat listening and gazing. They didn’t know the words, and there was no interpretation. They just listened.

I heaved a sigh of relief and turned once again toward my seat.

“Tell them Katie’s adoption story.”
“WHY?????”
“Just tell them.”
“It’s a long story,” I said.
“These men have plenty of time.”
I considered hopping the next flight home, but I turned back toward the prison audience and told them about Katie and how she’d come to be ours. The interpreter served them once again with the Ukrainian version, as I, trembling, dreaded what I would be asked to do next.When I turned, Vic was at last satisfied. I know I was as red as a boiled lobster when I sat down. How could he ambush me this way?
After the service, we returned to the van. Vic knew I was going to need some answers. In his thick British accent he explained to me, “These men have not heard the sound of a woman’s voice in a very, very long time. All they hear are harsh voices…men’s voices. Whether it’s prisoners or guards, it’s all they ever get to hear. Your voice was therapeutic for them. It didn’t matter what you said, it was the way you sounded. They needed to hear your voice.”It is that way here, isn’t it? We live in a culture where individuals demand THEIR needs be met, THEIR rights be fulfilled, and that THEY be served. Turn on a tv or radio, or go to a local restaurant, and you’ll hear it. Close your eyes. Is there a soft voice calling you to awareness of someone greater, someone full of mercy and grace, a God who became both man and servant for you? The media will tell you every bad or unfair thing that is going on in the world….or you can walk outside your door and see it for yourself. But where’s the voice calling out that this isn’t all there is?  WE ARE CALLED TO BE THAT VOICE! We are called to be merciful. We are called to share hope. We are called to love. We are called to look people in the eyes and smile, sending a message that they matter. We are called to be Jesus in the places where there is no Jesus.

It is my new goal to be that soft voice in a world of harsh voices. It may be tough at times. I may be tempted to demand my needs be met and my rights upheld. I may tremble. I may want to run back to my seat, but I am called to be that voice. God help me be it.